ZayZayEM - kickin' moron ass since 2002: Friday Night Horror Movie

I really do miss SBS cult classics -- even if they used to show on Monday (or sometimes something similar on Saturday) - and possibly they have been ressurected on Thursday nights -- and that means its either Seven's "Amazing line-up" of Lost/The Amazing Race/Stargate:Atlantis/Jeremiah or some foreign fetish horror/comedy/soft-core porno ... now I'm slightly more mature (and have the internet) its more of a dilemna than it used to.

They had The Shining in that slot last night (in said Thursday, possible cult slot - okay its in english, and certainly not porn...), and I saw what I'm dubbing the Advocat/Bathroom scene. Its the scene where Jack meets Mr. Grady in his fantasy sequence. In the "dream" Mr. Grady is a servant-type character (Jeevesy) but Jack knows that he was the previous caretaker who went nuts and sht his wife, twin daughters,a nd ultimately himself. In resposne to this Grady tells Jack that he can't've been the caretaker because Jack is, and Jack has ALWAYS been the caretaker: "I should know I've ALWAYS been here". Its that ALWAYS bit which solves the pat of The Shining that has bugged me, wtf is with the time travel shit. Okay, its still WTF, but less so. With them ALAWAYs being there it sort of offers a solution for the Grady and Jack personality breadowns, as their original eternal spirits (that have resided in the hotel for all eternity) take over. Maybe I should read the book and stop speaking crap...

Anyway today I watched the Evil Dead. the original. Now I've seen Army of Darkness, and its all OMFG medievil zombie kicking ass-ness with a one-armed chainsaw prosthetic, with evil twin, car, explosive, time warp ooh Kind Arthur, skeletons, .... erm... translation = general incoherent awesomeness = it rocks. Evil Dead does rock. And is quite obviously a breakthrough in gore-tastic artwork for horror films of that era. But Ash, Bruce Campbell, the wise cracking one-armed chainsaw wielding maniac with awesome one liners is just some pussy-assed cry baby co-ed, yet he's still supposed to be the hero... he's a pussy. You just want him to get mauled to pieces he's so nice and charming and scared shitless. Apparently in Evil Dead II there's a charming moment when after continuously being tormented by ancient Sumerian night-demons and his own possesed hand he suddenly *cracks* and becomes the psycho-Ash we all know and love. Awesome.

The zombies in Evil Dead are so inhuman in motion and vibe, I couldn't believe when watching the behind teh scenes, that they weren't puppets, but actual people. This is what made it so freaking amazing in terms of horror-art, they created this great unnatural feel from actual people - holy crap-my-pants. Okay, some of the face paint/clay/masks go a bit not-so-convincing (which is why I couldn't believe there were whole people under there) but its still great. The freak-ish clown get up of Ash's girlfriend singing "we're gonna get you" has got to be the scariest shit I've seen in forever. (Also absolutely hilarious, but I swear its going to give me nightmares - and not many things do).

Despite being a pussy in this film, check out Bruce Campbell's website. Its awesome, because he just happens to be an absolute legend. Turns out he was in Xena/Hercules. Upon seeing his documentary on fandom, he's just become cemented as a rare idol of mine for just being a versatile kickass guy. I want that book.

More Dead Links (HAR HAR)

Final note I saw "キャプテン　スーパーマーケット" on one of the Evil Dead posters in the extra features on evil Dead, which I translated (and have verified) as "Kyapten Sooparmarketto" or "Captain Supermarket". WTF!!!! It is hurting my brain.

PS - This is gross, and why I hope never ever to work in a hospital/nursing home personal care profession (and thanks to HypnoKitten/Jean for the link in my B$mish)